Deane's Blog

lingering at wisdom's door

FaithDeane Watters1 Comment

In Proverbs 8:6 Wisdom calls out: "Listen, for I have worthy things to say."And later in 8: 34-35 she exclaims, "Blessed is the one who listens to me, watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway. For whoever finds me finds life and receives favor from the LORD."

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At which door do you find yourself lingering? What are you longing to find? Who is on the other side of that entryway?

I find that I am on a constant search. I first knew about Lady Wisdom when I was young and saw that my mom was a woman of strength and faith. She was not one to give judgmental or harsh reviews of her fellow man. She understood. She loved well. She gave and gave and that was my first introduction. That. She who suffered for the consequences of a quick decision and a resolve to "sleep in the bed she had made," now became teacher.

A drive through town after moving again she sought Wisdom by praying for a church. In that church she found teaching that told her about Jesus and his personal love for her, about his death and forgiveness. She welcomed him in and embraced his call to love, and to live with his guidance. She was no longer alone on this lonely road and within Love's embrace she found strength to endure.

She was my first door. I stood there, lingering long and pondering the wonder of her life. First I toddled at that doorway, not recognizing its uniqueness. Listening and watching, I wondered what my life might be. Soon I found my own feet, my own faith and made belief my own, interested in God and wanting what my mother had.

In college I asked my brother if he thought I could be like her. He quietly responded,

"Maybe, but I don't think you have suffered enough."

Suffered? Wisdom and suffering - they often come together. As sadness and tears are often brothers so suffering brings its sister wisdom and then choices are made to welcome or reject because we always have the right to be hurt, angry, or ugly. But this was not her way. She chose love and forgiveness, not bitterness.

Other doorways have found me lingering. Lady Wisdom! Teach me for I am humble of heart and am longing to know you. She has come to me in unlikely places, in marriage, children, disappointments, the Word, several churches, our pastor, my brother, beautiful friends, House of Hope, freedom from self-doubt. Writers like CS Lewis, Brennan Manning and Ann Voskamp added refreshment to this thirsty soul telling me again and again the truth that I am loved. I am known. God became man so I could know him, so he could save me from myself, so Wisdom could even be possible.

One doorway where I currently wait is teaching me how to write in a way that is my own. I am pausing here as I call on Wisdom and stand at the door of my own writing voice. I cannot go forward without her.

"Lady Wisdom! I hear that you are more precious than rubies. And that nothing I desire can compare with you. You offer counsel, sound judgment and understanding. You love those who love you and those who seek you find you! Those who seek you are blessed and find life along with favor. What do you say?”

She replies,"Wait here. I do have much to offer because you are seeking and watching for me. There will be other opportunities to grow. Find them. Pause nearby and look for me. I will be there for you when you have eyes to see and ears to hear."

My search is not over. It will never be. Jesus-in-me. Wisdom personified. Endless possibilities. Many more doors. I am eager to open the next one.

At what door are you lingering?